It's Time.

It's officially time. Time for me to go get a "regular" job. I love watching Bubba - he's so great and I hate that my leaving is going to put his family in a financial struggle. But for whatever reason, they choose not to budget to pay me. And while I understand that things happen - they are only paying me $25 a day to watch their baby/toddler. For those of you who don't have kids in daycare - trust me when I say that's CHEAP! It's well below minimum wage and I was fine with it because I felt like I had a reason to get up in the morning. And if you've ever been out of work for an extended period of time you know how important this is!! I also really enjoy it, and it was enough to pay my student loans each month and have a little extra. I realize that my husband's money is my money but it does feel nice to buy or make him things purchased with money I earned. But to not get paid, to be messaged at the last minute (sometimes just as I'm leaving the house at 6am) that I'm not needed (which of course means no pay) is unacceptable. And while I've expressed these things with her I don't think she understands. I can't imagine that she would continue going to work each day if she wasn't being paid and she really wasn't sure her employer was going to be able to pay all that is owed at the time they say. So now begins the daunting task of applying for jobs. I will admit that if I could go back in time I would push myself harder to get my degree. I wouldn't let myself quit for any reason. Because now I'm looking at a difficult situation. No degree and no "real" job for the last few years does not give a company much confidence in an applicant. And while there is no job I am too good for, I refuse to work any job that will consistently compromise my time with my husband. So I have today and Monday off. I will spend this time in prayer and action by filling out applications. And I hope that she understands that there will be days where I'll either need to leave early or come in late so that I can go to interviews. She's become a friend and I adore her family but there comes a time where you really have to take care of yourself. And for me, that time is now.